"Layuk"

"Layuk", a new word which Im not sure whether I spelled it correctly...jz knew dis word jz now when I met my friends...They aaid I looked "layuk" when they saw me...so, wat does it means?? It means looks terrible or messy or old something like that... When I came back home, looked at the mirror, suddenly felt like wanna ask myself... "What am I doing?" and "Ho Weng Kwen...what the hell happened to you? Come on...This isnt you..." Yea...everyday saying the same thing "It's time to refresh myself", "It's time to stand up again", "It's time to get back on track". But then bla bla bla...it's all bullshit... Hmm...perhaps I still need time?? Or...perhaps force myself to do what I should be doing again?? Arg....dont know...and I've no idea....I don't even hv any idea of what the hell am I saying now too... Yea...we mentioned a very little bit about you too... How are you?? Well...I know it's all my fault...you don't have to search for the answer as there are no answer for our problems...or...the only answer is...MY FAULT... So...pleawe take good care of yourself yea...

最近狂听的歌。。。

最近一人走走或待在学校过夜时狂听的歌。。。





而这首若把“相逢恨晚”改成“相逢恨早”就中到切底吧~呵呵。。。

Reminisce...

Due to laziness, today I don't feel like doing anything so kind of like give myself another break tonight...Then, saw a friend online FB and went to say "Hi" to her/him.

We had some chat and mostly was about what he/she experienced recently, especially about he/she chasing a target...Although we had a nice chat I would say, what he/she said makes me reminisce the time we had before...which makes me feel heart broken...Well of cause I didn't blame him/her, just that it...aiks~I don't know how to express that kind of feeling~

Anyway, found a song today and like the music so much~ It was produced by a Malaysian singer named Nick Davis.

Any other ways to manipulate my mood???

As I'm not a guy who is alway open to everyone and do not like to tell people my problems and my personal stuff like a crying baby asking for help, I tend to learn...or should I say, force myself to be tough to swallow anything that comes to me.

I know this can be hard but I just can't do it to keep on telling people the same things and I do not want to troubling people and make them worry about me or talk about my stuff. That just not me.

Ever since I was born, I never share any personal stuff with people no matter what happened to me unless that person owned my trust. However, I still wouldnt share every single things of me.

So, I usualy express it by hinting and refer my matters as a third person matters. So I'm so thankful to have a bunch of friends who willing are to listen and realy discuss abt it or talk about it although it doesnt help much. But at least it is a way for me express my stuff.

Sadly, there are so much things that happened and complicated stuff just doesnt stopped happening even until today. How am I going to cope with it? All I can do is just concentrate on my works and try to get myself. But this doesnt works all the time. So lately, I have actively join friends to go "Sing K" hope that I can release myself by doing something silly like yelling and sing crazily. Yes it helps....only for a moment perhaps? Slowly, I am addicted  to "Sing K" and would like to be able to sing songs with lyrics that suits my mood. Sadly, I have a poor singing skill and capability...

Well well welll....or maybe blogging is also another way for me to release?? Although most of the posts that I posted recently were meaningless and like bull shitting...

Anyway, life goes on and I'm still alive...

Tell myself to smile so no one would know what happened... and also to give my group the confident that their leader is fit to work on the tasks and leading them to work on the assignments...although he is actually in a mess...

So this is just a lame post with no picture or attractive content...

Goood nite kuchingnites and evryone in this world.

Btw, sorry for my bad english too...

An incident that has deeply striked my heart...

Well...saw an incident that's very sad and also deeply striked my heart for a while...

It happens when I was having my dinner...

A lady who was sitting not far from me was talking with a phone...Suddenly, her tone got louder and started to scold the person who was in the phone.

After listening to what she scolded and what she said, I got to know that it was her husband  and the dialogue was about things like her husband cheated on her...

Yes it's sad....and at the same time...I guess...probably YOU are or were doing de same thing too..yes??no???

Not saying that im cheated on YOU, jz that some of the things that lady scolded made me feels like you would say the same things too..

Anyway...I know it's all my bad and watever it is...

I hope you're doin good and please dont give up on urself...

Also...just dont care about me or try to get to know my condition or watever...

All you have to do is just love yourself more and do something good for yourself...

Do things that are good for you instead of the bad ones...

All the best in everything yea...

Gota learn...

From today onward,

Gota learn to speak good words ...

Gota learn to hold my bad temper ...

Gota learn not to complain ...

Gota learn not to get affected by others ...

Gota learn to swallow anything ...

Gota learn to control my mood ...

Gota learn to let go ...

Gota learn ... ...

心碎

一直担心着，牵挂着。。。也许因为这件事，所以最近都没胃口，也没心做好一切。。。好想找你，却担心这样会搞得我们没完没了。。。一直找机会混朋友，但愿能热闹些，不会想太多。。但事后还是一样逃避不了那低落的心情。。

但最近得知你的思想和想法后。。。你真的让我切低的心碎和失望。。。

我真的很后悔去得知这一切。。。没想到得知的。。是那么的伤人。。仿佛好像得了心脏病似的。。

呵呵。。哈哈。。只能一直吞。。

熟悉的响声。。。

听到那熟悉的电话响声,并很开心地向它跑去。。。后来才知道并不是你。。结果却换来一场空,一场悲伤。。。

别想我，也别担心我。。。加油。。。